The Career Clinic Blog

Do you think it’s a good practice to interview for a job you don’t want? You know, to practice interviewing?

Some career consultants think that’s fine. I’m not one of them. A career consultant, that is. But I also don’t think it’s okay to waste someone’s time. Practice on your own time.

If during the interview you discover the position isn’t what you had in mind after all, you’ll want to turn it down graciously--once you get an offer, that is. A note of appreciation is always in order, especially if it’s by snail mail. It’s the right thing to do, but it’s also pragmatic. Things change. The person who brought you in to talk about the less-than-ideal situation might change jobs herself, and be hiring for your dream position the next time you’re looking.

I was going to offer a suggestion for what to do if you don’t get the job you’ve interviewed for and want desperately, but I realized I already had. Write that note.

I’ve had a lot of practice writing thank-you notes after losing out on a job. I’m a writer! I rarely get the gig. But when people take the time to consider my work, they get a heartfelt letter. If they offer me suggestions for how to improve that work, they get a longer heartfelt letter--and probably some gourmet cookies.

As for why it stings not to get an offer for a job you don’t want, I’m afraid I can’t help--but I can relate. How many times have you watched a child who’s completely lost interest in a toy suddenly decide it’s her favorite only because some other kid wants it? It’s a cliché, how often someone dumps a boyfriend or girlfriend only to be upset when that person rebounds a little too quickly for the dumper’s taste.

I guess you just have to remind yourself this isn’t something you wanted. Then go get what you do want. And don’t delay. In the words of one of my favorite bosses: “Ready, fire, aim.”

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A job interview isn’t a competition. You’re not trying to edge anyone out of anything.

A job interview is an opportunity to find out if you’d enjoy working with the person who suggested you meet.

“In my book,” communications consultant Richard Gallagher says, “no one ever blows an interview. Even if you walk in unprepared. The purpose of an interview is to show who you are.”

Maybe you’re the kind of person who doesn’t prepare for important meetings!

An interview is an information exchange. Maybe you’ll click with the person asking you questions, maybe the job will be even dreamier than you imagined, maybe you’re needed this afternoon.

And maybe not.

Then what? What happens if you get an offer for a job you don’t want, or don’t get an offer for a job you do want? And why the heck does it sting if you don’t get an offer for a job you don’t want?

Some thoughts in my final post this week.

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Enroll in graduate school. Wait tables. Move back in with your parents. If it’s difficult to find a so-called real job after graduation, you might be considering one or more of these options.

Daniel Seddiqui didn’t. He took forty rejections from potential employers and decided to find a job in all fifty states. In fifty weeks! Then he did. Daniel talked fifty people into hiring him for only a week, for fifty consecutive weeks--and walked away from the experience with dozens of offers for full-time employment.

So don’t let anyone tell you there aren’t jobs out there.

Daniel’s working on a summer program for high school graduates now, to expose them to different industries before they choose a college major. He’s a walking, talking encyclopedia of possibility…from sea to shining sea.

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"Any questions?"

That question from an employer is a sign your job interview is winding down. So says Knock ‘em Dead author Martin Yate, who suggests you wait to ask about the dental plan until you have an offer.

Instead he hopes you’ll ask about your responsibilities. “What will you want me to have accomplished three months from now? Six months from now? What do you think my biggest challenges will be? Who has succeeded in this position, and why?”

You know, questions like that.

One purpose of the interview is for each of you to decide if you can imagine working together. By phrasing your questions the way Martin suggests, it will be easier for the employer to picture you in the position. Especially if you take notes. You’re taking notes, right?

Any questions?

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An expert is someone who can admit she doesn't know. Ever heard that one? Anne Headley is a career consultant who finds it difficult to go on job interviews. She doesn't do that very much anymore because she works for herself. But her clients find her relatable because she doesn't pretend to have all the answers.

"That isn't what they pay me for," she says. "They pay me to ask good questions, and help them discover the answers for themselves."

Anne gives me the impression she learns as much from her clients as they do from her. When she told one of them about her discomfort with job interviews she thought his response was brilliant: "People don't like a martini on the first sip, either." It reminded both Anne and me that someone who interviews well isn't necessarily the best person for the job. We think job hunters and employers should keep that in mind.

Anne isn't shy about offering her opinion when she has one, but she's meticulous about framing it as only that--her perspective. She thinks, for example, you should keep the job you have while you look for a new one. You won't be desperate and people will be more likely to return your calls--for starters.

A recent client ignored that advice, Anne says, and didn't take long at all to find a new job.

"So what do I know?" Anne says. The willingness with which she admits that makes me think she is an expert indeed.

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So I'm on Twitter, and I'm treating it like I do my blog. Seriously. I want to help you get your hopes up, experiment with your life, and savor your story. I think of this blog--and the radio vignette, for that matter--as bursts of inspiration. Twitter? Microbursts of inspiration.

But it's Friday, and I'm tempted to squish something silly into 140 characters or fewer and share that. It was racy, but only just a little. Mostly it was cute.

Darrell thought it was hilarious. "Why not?" he said. And then, "Do it."

So I did. And it gnawed at me immediately. Because whether you found it hilarious or a waste of keystrokes, it wasn't something you've come to expect from The Career Clinic. So I hit delete. Or was it...untweet?

I think it's important to decide what you want to offer the world, and stick to that script.

Silly is the best part of any script, in my opinion. But having anything that bordered on racy in my Twitter stream felt like seeing WD-40 on sale at Hallmark.

Not wrong, just out of place.

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There's someone who helped us out on the most recent edition of The Career Clinic, and I don't know how to thank him--but here goes.

Thanks, Ken. Thanks for listening. Thanks for taking Darrell and me up on our offer to call in, and give us a break from killing time--I hate killing time!--while a technical problem got resolved. Thanks for telling us about an assessment that reassured you that you were doing the right thing with your life. It was a perfect little exchange at exactly the right time.

Most of all, thanks for slipping in that you love the program. I'm still new enough to the job I crave the reassurance we're helping people. And I hope everyone who listens will consider letting us know how we can do better at that.

I'll do my best to live up to your assessment in the meantime, Ken.

We appreciate it!

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Have you been offered an exit interview? Laurie Ruettimann is a human resources professional who thinks that time would be better spent--whether you're the manager or the departing employee--getting a donut.

"The exit interview is the worst point in the employment cycle to ask someone's opinion," Laurie says. "I coach people not to say anything. You don't have to accept the offer of an exit interview. Just politely decline."

Laurie bets that anything you share will just be filed under sour grapes, so what's the point?

Good managers engage their employees in thoughtful conversation constantly, another reason Laurie thinks exit interviews are unnecessary--at best.

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Would you tell a bumblebee to pick one flower and settle down? Sure you would. If you’re crazy.

Barbara Sher calls herself a career counselor, but I think she’s more of a fairy godmother--judging from how many people she’s saved by coining the term scanners. Scanners find it impossible to build their lives around a single interest. They’re entrepreneurs, they’re artists, they’re radio talk show hosts. They’re people who want to fix cars by day, play the trumpet at night, and…chip in…as a golf pro on weekends.

Legions of them credit Barbara for reassuring them they’re not crazy.

Don’t forget you can order the combo platter at the Dream Job Café. I refuse to choose anything else, and Barbara wrote the book on that concept. Still not convinced? Look into a retreat she’s offering later this year--and tell her hello from everyone at The Career Clinic.

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“I can’t work here for a penny under 65.” Sixty-five thousand dollars a year, that is. So says the Daniel Miller character in the movie Defending Your Life, practicing a salary negotiation with his wife. The wife, as the prospective employer, says she can’t pay him 65. Then he can’t work there, Daniel says. “Fifty-eight thousand,” his wife says. “Sixty-five,” he counters. Sixty’s her next offer. Sixty-five, he insists. “Sixty-one?” she asks.

“Let me make this perfectly clear,” Daniel says, not letting up. He can’t work for her for less than $65,000.

Cut to the next scene. Daniel’s across the desk from the employer, who says, “I’m prepared to offer you $49,000.”

“I’ll take it,” Daniel says, shaking his hand.

Negotiation doesn’t come easily to many of us. So we turn to the so-called experts, who’ve been known to say things like, “Don’t let ‘em see how much you want the job.” Career columnist Lee Miller thinks that’s terrible advice. He says your enthusiasm for the work will set you apart from other candidates. “You don’t lose job offers because you negotiate,” he continues. “You lose them because you negotiate badly.”

Lee’s the author of Get More Money on Your Next Job. Oh wait. There’s more to the title: ...In Any Economy. That phrase is italicized not just because it’s part of the book title but because you may need the extra little bit of encouragement. You’re not worth less (get it?) because times are challenging. You might be so well-suited to helping a company rise to those challenges you’re worth more.

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